Insomnia and stuff

Picture is from here

Its past midnight and I am devastatingly awake. I had planned to be good today; to go to bed at 10 (which became 11ish after facebook) and get up at 6 and write. I have a strange phantom burning smell going on. I hope its not a real burning smell. I don't think it is, it started over the Pride Weekend when, instead of making gay memories at one of the biggest Pride festivals I might ever experience, I was in bed self-medicating and making sure to cover all surfaces with a thin layer of aerosol-snot.  I also remember the phantom burning yesterday in the movie theatre. I have only just decided that the smell is burning (and not B.O., for instance) because I showered fairly recently and googled "phantom burning smell". It is a real thing. The internet says I should go and see a doctor, "preferably a neurologist" about it. I decided to stop asking the internet and to just go to bed and think about it tomorrow (after writing what I have to write).


This blog began as a travel journal-like thing. I came to the 'Murrica and felt compelled to share my experiences, etc. Then it occurred to me that a) probably few people care and b) writing about my time here in travelogue form might force me to be in tourist mode and not living-here-for-two-years-and-having-arguments-with-the-laundromat-guy-because-he-lost-my-bag-and-wouldn't-compensate-me-so-I-made-a-scene-and-stormed-the-fuck-out mode; you know, every day life mode. Anyways, I have experienced major changes recently and so I return to travel journal-like writing, at least for this post.


I just started a new job in Oakland, California. It is in the Bay Area, and it's close to its more famous cousin, San Francisco.  They say (or maybe I say) New York is to San Fran as Jo'burg is to Cape Town. One is a bit faster, one is a bit more beautiful. One is less frenetic, and one is less drug-induced. My job is to do research on gay men (and other "men who have sex with men") and HIV, and also to help improve access to services to gay men (and other "MSM") to health services amongst other things. A lot of my work will be focused on a few African countries, and it will pay attention to how human rights environments shape people's risk. It's all the stuff that I think about and blab about in my spare time, except now someone is paying me to do them, and I am in an organization of people who have amazing track-records at this kind of work. It's all very exciting. I am a fully-fledged professional gay now. I am gay all day.


 I have been working from New York until now. I am going to continue until the International Aids Conference in Washington DC (finally possible because travel-bans on HIV positive people have been lifted, but not travel bans on sex workers unfortunately) where I will learn a lot of stuff and meet a lot of people who do amazing things.


I think I have bored myself to sleep with all this writing by now (I hope it can be similarly useful to you). John, if you are reading this, sorry for being late, I am suffering extreme writers block for the things that matter, but not for the things that don't. I am waking up early to do that other thing. I cant even apostrophize.


Guys, it can get hot in New York. I even saw grown men wearing a nat waslap on their heads the other day. True story.


K




Oh, I graduated (yay!) so now I am an adult. And I don't know why I thought this post would be in travelogue form, or even what that means really. Such is life, etc.